Purim Spoof 09: Prominent Rabbi Banned By RCA

Vatican City – In a stunning development, The Jewish Week has learned that the Holy See is courting Rabbi Haskel Looksee, planning to offer him a top post in the Archdiocese of New York.
“It’s part of a p.r. move to bolster the pope’s ratings in the ecumenical community after the Williamson fiasco,” a church insider revealed, citing the decision to allow a Holocaust-denying bishop back into the good graces of the Vatican.

“We promised Haskel he could wear a black top hat during services instead of the big red yarmulka, and he seemed interested,” the church official said.

The move came about after the veteran and highly popular Upper East Side rabbi was excommunicated by the Rabbinical Council of America for attending a professional football game in Phoenix between the Cardinals and the Saints.

“Being associated with Catholic clergy is absolutely forbidden, and even more so for being seen with cardinals and saints,” said RCA executive Matjes “Red” Herring. He indicated that videos had also been made of Rabbi Looksee attending a Pittsburgh game. “He should have known the Ten Commandments tell us, ‘Thou shalt not Steeler.’”

Westchester Jewish Conference

Westchester’s Jewish Community Relations Organization