‘Shoeless Khalid’ Jackson in midseason form: Yanks’ new hurler impressed Bush with his speed and placement flinging the leather.
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The New York Yankees, desperate to find a hard-throwing right-handed starting pitcher, have signed the Iraqi journalist who gained fame for throwing a shoe at President George Bush last fall in Baghdad. “He’s got a lot of moxie, and that’s what we need,” said owner Abner Doubleday Steinbrenner, the latest of George’s sons to run the team, in introducing the young man, who will be known as “Shoeless Khalid” Jackson, to the press.
“The kid is quick, he’s got great control and we think he’ll be a great box office draw for our many Iraqi fans out there. We just have to teach him to throw a baseball instead of tan loafers,” he added. Steinbrenner would not disclose how much the Yankees were paying the former journalist but said the plan is to “bring him on slowly” by first sending him down to work out with the Guantanamo Bay Brayers in Cuba for an indeterminate number of years.
“We can have him working out ‘round the clock down there,” said Yanks manager Joe Giradi. “It’s torture for some, but he’ll be fine.”
“It was a no-brainer for the kid,” Steinbrenner said. “He traded in his prison stripes for pin stripes and we’re proud to have him.”
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