It does not appear on Jewish calendars, Jewish day schools do not teach about it and many Jews don’t observe it. But as kosher restaurateurs in New York know, Valentine’s Day is big for business. As the holiday of love has become ever more popular in this country, many Jews, including Orthodox ones, have come to embrace it as well. “For Jews, Valentine’s Day has a double whammy,” Gil Marks, an Orthodox rabbi and author of the kosher cookbooks “The World of Jewish Cooking” and “Olive Trees and Honey,” pointed out. Not only did it originate as a Roman pagan holiday (the observance of which, for Jews, would constitute avoda zara — idol worship), but it was adopted by Christians in the late Middle
Ages, who turned a martyred Roman saint into a symbol for romantic love. Yet Marks noted that many holidays like Thanksgiving and Mother’s Day have shed their religious connotations, and he sees no reason for Valentine’s Day to be any different, as long as the “Saint” is dropped from the name of the holiday. Not surprisingly, an examination of dozens of kosher cookbooks failed to turn up a single recipe for Valentine’s Day. I felt briefly victorious when I found a recipe for Valentinos — chocolate-covered cookies filled with chocolate ganache — in the “My Most Favorite Dessert Company Cookbook.” But Marks informed me that Valentinos have nothing to do with Valentine’s Day; they are named for silent-film star Rudolph Valentino, just as other desserts were named after actress Sarah Bernhardt and singer Nellie Melba. At Levana’s, a gourmet kosher restaurant on the Upper West Side, owner Sol Kirschenbaum admitted that business on Valentine’s Day is significantly greater than usual. “Manhattan is a Modern Orthodox town,” he told me. “And Valentine’s Day is a big night for dating.” Or as the restaurant’s general manager, Maryann Lai, put it, “Jewish men are very romantic. If they’re gonna spend, that’s when they’ll do it.” She said that the restaurant sells “high-end” food and wine to men who are trying to impress their dates, including the restaurant’s special dessert for two to share. Steven Traube, who manages the Prime Grill kosher steakhouses in both New York and Los Angeles, said that in addition to putting roses and chocolates on the tables, his restaurants actually offer a Valentine’s Day menu that includes chateau of steak for two and a molten chocolate cake. “Since we’re doing a lot of doubles [tables for two],” he said, “and experiencing a lot of turnover, we need a special menu anyway — something that the kitchen can make easily and get out on time.” Is there a Jewish way to celebrate Valentine’s Day? The closest equivalent in Jewish tradition may be Tu b’Av, the summertime holiday in which Jewish maidens danced in white in the fields so that the young men could select their mates. For Tu b’Av, cookbook authors Phyllis and Miryam Glazer recommend Peach Champagne Cocktail, Yellowtail Ceviche in Lemon-Coriander Marinade and Champagne and Melon Soup with Feta Cheese. But Tu b’Av may be closer to Sadie Hawkins Day, the American holiday when matches were made, than Valentine’s Day. I put in a call to Rabbi Shmuley Boteach, author of “Kosher Sex” and “Dating Secrets of the Ten Commandments,” among many other books. He agreed that Valentine’s Day has lost its Christian underpinnings, and he urged Jews to use the holiday as a “springboard for Jewish values, to promote a moral agenda.” In our “loveless, lonely culture,” he added, “Valentine’s Day should be a day for husbands to show their appreciation of their wives. After all, Judaism is the only religion that glorifies sex within marriage.” This makes sense. The Sabbath, after all, is set aside as a time for physical pleasure and relaxation, with couples enjoined to have sexual relations on Friday night. Sabbath dinner is traditionally supposed to include fish, garlic and beet greens — foods that are supposed to increase stamina and prolong the sexual act. Is it any wonder that Jews have a candlelight dinner every Friday night? Judy Bart Kancigor, author of the recently published cookbook “Cooking Jewish,” told me that she planned to make a special dinner for her husband on Valentine’s Day. “I’ll make him something he loves to eat,” she said. “It’s the thought behind it that counts.”
From Judy Bart Kancigor’s “Cooking Jewish: 532 Great Recipes from the Rabinowitz Family” (Workman Publishing, 2007)
Sweet Smooches 1⁄2 pound (2 sticks) unsalted butter, at room temperature 1⁄2 cup sugar 1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract 1 cup pecans, finely chopped (about 3 1⁄2 ounces) 2 cups all-purpose flour 12 ounces unwrapped Hershey’s Kisses
1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Line several baking sheets with parchment paper. 2. Mix the butter with a fork in a large bowl until light and fluffy. Add the sugar, vanilla and pecans, and mix until well combined. Add the flour and stir just until incorporated. 3. Form the cookies with your hands, wrapping each kiss in a heaping tablespoon of dough, taking care to retain the shape of the kiss. Place the cookies on the prepared baking sheets. They won’t spread, so they can be placed close together, though without touching. 4. Bake two sheets at a time, on the bottom third and top third oven racks, rotating the sheets from top to bottom and front to back halfway through, until the cookies are lightly golden, 20 to 25 minutes. Let them cool on the baking sheets set on wire racks.
Makes 5 to 6 dozen cookies. Do not refrigerate or freeze, or the kiss will become rock hard.
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