President Baruch O. Bauma, head of The White House Synagogue (commonly known as The White Shul) in downtown Washington, D.C., announced today that he was in favor of gays and lesbians in his congregation being granted the same rights currently enjoyed by all other members.
The Bridges of Medicine Counter—Moishe Bridges opens a pharmacy
Kinky Booze—Rabbi waters down kiddush club drinks
The Gas Menagerie—Zoo animals eat chulent
Of Mice and Mendel—Jewish scientist conducts lab research
Allyiddin—A walking tour of Brooklyn
Chava and the Angry Mench--Jewish couple fights
A Raisin in the Mun—New recipe for
Mo’ Town the Musical--Rappers recount the story of Moses
Barley Over Broadway—Kosher soup kitchen opens in Times Square
The Wolf Of The Wall—A playboy hits on women at the Kotel
Crowded With A Chance of Meatballs—Congregants rush to the kiddush tables
Froyzen— Chasidic remake of “Frozen”
The Hondle Games—Jews bargain with store merchants
American Hassle--Israel refuses to recognize legitimacy of U.S. rabbis
Loin Survivor—Baby boy is circumcised
Her – How Orthodox congregants prefer to refer to brilliant, learned female clergy.
Dollars Buyers Club—Rabbis run money-laundering operation
A collection of 17 never before released songs that clearly show the Beatles had been influenced by Jewish doctrine (and you wondered why two of Paul’s three wives were Jewish!) Enjoy the “Frum Four” as they play these soon-to-become classics:
1) The Shul on the Hill
2) Hey Jew
3) This Bochur
4) I Saw Her Shuckling There
5) Six Days a Week
6) When I’m 120.
7) All You Need is Lulav
8) Do You Want to Know a Secret? (No, It’s Lashon Harah!)
9) Eleanor’s Rabbi
10) Shlep! (I Need Somebody)
11) I Want to Hold Your Hand (But You’re Shomer Negiyah)
12) It Won’t Be Long (The Mohel’s Song)
13) P.S. I Love OU
14) Strawberry Fields Forbidden
Jerusalem—The Chief Rabbinate of Israel, the supreme religious authority for Jews in Israel, announced this week that it would take disciplinary action against Rabbi Avi Wiseguy, due to certain “un-Orthodox” views that the Modern Orthodox rabbi holds.
Fort Lee, NJ – The president of a synagogue here was accused this week of sabotaging the congregation’s Simchat Torah celebration last September by purposely jamming the aisles and other dance areas so members could not move about easily while trying to participate in the festive holiday occasion.
‘Peace in our time,’ says president; Putin to play key role.
Washington – President Obama, in a surprise appearance with Iranian President Hassan Woohani at his side, announced a resolution today to the longstanding conflict between the U.S. and Iran and said the world “can breathe a sigh of relief now that our differences have been solved.”
YU Suspends Its Shtup-and-Frisk Policy; Reform Leader Resigns To Become Astronaut; Conservative Movement To Distribute Survival Kit; Abbas Announces Major Concession; Foxman, Hoenlein To Switch Jobs; Putin Sending Troops To Seize Alaska