Rabbi Avi Wizened Continues Title Search For Female Associate
Fri, 02/26/2010

Riverdale, NY – Having switched the title of the woman who serves his congregation in a rabbinic role from Maharat to Rabba, spiritual leader Avi Wizened announced today that he is still not satisfied with the result, and has hired Vanna White of game show “Wheel Of Fortune” fame to help him find the right vowel to end the word “Rabb_.”

“Maybe it’s an `e’ or an `o’ or `u’,” the frustrated rabbi muttered. “Or it could be ‘sometimes `y’.”

Asked why he had not thought of an “i” to close out the word to describe Sarah Herwits, who performs in most ways as an Orthodox rabbi, Wizened said, “I’m all about `I,’ that’s my favorite letter, so I’m saving it for me.

Vanna White said the situation presents a challenge – “I’m not such a great speller,” she acknowledged, “but I am known for T and A.”

Herwits, who said most congregants still refer to her as “Hey You,” said her focus continues to be on fulfilling her rabbinic duties, and teaching gifted women students of the Talmud to recite the daily blessing thanking God “for not making me a jerk.”