Tears in Heaven

Reflecting on the Murder of Leiby Kletzky

07/18/11
Jewish Week Online Columnist

How can we even begin to process this? A beautiful 8 year-old boy, Leiby Kletzky, was simply on his way home from his local yeshiva day camp in Borough Park. He was to meet his mother at their appointed location, but failed to show up. A search was begun by law enforcement and members of the community, and all remained hopeful that Leiby would be found, safe and sound.

And, yet, on Wednesday morning, we all learned that Leiby had been murdered, and parts of his body were found in multiple locations. A precious child, living in a presumably secure and trusted neighborhood, was brutally murdered, and no one seems able to discern any possible connection between the suspects and the victim. There seems to be no rhyme or reason to this tragedy. All we can possibly ask is, why?

In the midst of heartbreak and tears, we find ourselves with many questions: Why do these things happen? Why do bad thing happen to good people? Why do tragedies, challenges, crimes, and illness strike us?

As a rabbi, I am asked similar questions at least once a week. Part of the mystery of human existence lays in the answer to “Why do bad things happen to good people?” And, boy, do I wish I had that answer. I wish I had the answer for a young father in my congregation who doesn’t understand why he has been stricken with worsening lung cancer. I wish I had the answer for a mother whose son inexplicably committed suicide a few months ago. I wish I had the answer for the religious school student who refuses to believe in God because the Holocaust took place. I wish…

Upon learning of a death, a Jew traditionally offers the words, “Baruch Dayan HaEmet.” Blessed is the Righteous Judge. These three words are meant to address some of this mystery. God, we hope and assume, has a different viewpoint of everything that happens down here on earth. God sees the big picture. Hopefully, God knows something that we don’t, and the struggles of our lives are important pieces of a much larger puzzle. We pray that our struggles have meaning and reason, even if we remain unaware. We may comfort ourselves with reminders that, “It’s all part of God’s plan.”

Other traditions in Judaism seek answers in a “Cause and Effect” kind of way – what did I do to cause this? Is this (illness, loss, divorce, pain) somehow my fault? If it is, and if we decide to look at life this way, it helps us regain a sense of control. Ah, so, if I did something to bring this suffering upon myself, then I MUST be able to do something to avoid it in the future. The belief about the destruction of the Second Temple being brought upon us by “sinat chinam,” baseless hatred, within the Jewish community, is an example of this way of thinking. There are even those who try to find reasons within the Jewish community for somehow being to blame for the Holocaust (a truly despicable way of thinking).

And then, there are those who, despite all other possibilities, recognize that sometimes terrible things happen, and there is no reason. How could I ever try to understand that, somehow, God decided that beautiful Lieby needed to die, and in such a brutal manner? And, worse, how could I possibly even consider, for a split second, that Lieby or his family are somehow to blame for bringing this tragedy upon them?

As uncomfortable as it is for us, sometimes we may just have to acknowledge that bad things happen, and we are sometimes powerless to stop them. Whether we like it or not, God gave us free will: “See, I set before you today life and good, and death and evil” (Deut. 30:15). God, by giving us choice, must have understood that there would be those who would choose incorrectly. Death and evil exist, and we all must work hard to choose goodness and life-giving acts in our lives. I like to think that, when a human being chooses evil, God is just as saddened as we are, and cries with us in our grief. God holds our hand, mourns with us, and continues to hope for a day when humanity will choose “good” and “life.”

Let us begin to choose “good” now, by surrounding the Kletzky family with prayers of comfort, strength, and love. To paraphrase Psalm 130, God, we are crying out to you from the depths, and we pray that you hear our voices. God, take care of all those who experience loss, pain, injury, heartbreak, and struggle, and please provide them with the strength and courage necessary to see the beauty, goodness, and blessings of Your world. HaMakom y’nachem etchem b’toch sh’ar avalei Tziyon v’Yerushalayim. May the Kletzky family find comfort among the mourners of Zion and Jerusalem. And may Lieby’s memory be for a blessing.

 

Last Update:

07/23/2011 - 16:44

Comments

I believe we don't understand these kinds of events because most of us still believe that God is in charge and "has His reasons which we can't understand". In that condition we have failed to evolve to the point of thinking of God in a different way. First of all, I believe that man created God just as all other gods were created to try to explain things they could not comprehend. My concept of God is that it represents how to live a moral and ethical life in peace and harmony with all humans regardless of their differences. We make our own decisions. What happens to individuals, in many situations, is a matter of chance, not a decision of God. We continually have to make irrational excuses in order to continue to believe that God is "allowing bad things to happen to good people".

It really is difficult to explain to ourselves why such acts of violence occur; sometimes this allows people to respond with additional violence and the history of our people is rife with such occasions. But the rabbi's remarks do not really offer consolation in spite of good intentions. Frankly, in such cases, there really is no response that can be offered; perhaps just a hug and a presence of friends and family to assure the bereaved that they are not alone in their grief even though we recognize that empathetically our grief can never be the same as theirs.

I cannot wrap my head around this tragedy. Your article did make sense somehow about free will..I have asked the question since learning of little Lieby's death, why did G-d let this happen...but then I read your article, and I do understand what you are saying. Not that I take comfort in it, because a beautiful innocent and pure life has still been lost, but I see things more clearly now. Thank you for this article.

Early last week, I commented on my blog about a local (and much less shocking) tragedy in my neighborhood - a house fire where (thank God) nobody was hurt but much damage was done. The same question arose - how could God let this happen.

My first reaction was that we ask this question all too often. Then it occured to me that maybe we don't ask it often enough.

I woke up this morning. How could God allow such a thing to happen? Knowing what a completely jerk I can be sometimes? Knowing (as only God can) the things I’ve done? I have 4 healthy wonderful normal children. Why does that happen? What did my wife and I do to deserve that?

I recognize that these thoughts are cold comfort in the face of such horrific events, and would NEVER offer them to someone so bereaved.

Even so, as we (innocent, uninvolved, blessed) bystanders attempt to make sense of events, it might be food for thought.

You can read the entire post here:
http://www.edibletorah.com/2011/07/12/too-much-or-not-enough/

It is not G-d's will that people die. Little Lieby Kletsky didn't die because G-d willed it. I am Jewish and I was taught that G-d gave people free will to do good or evil. This was done by evil. Cain didn't kill Abel because G-d wanted Abel in heaven. Cain was evil. I was taught that G-d also cries when someone dies no matter how old the person is. A baby and a 95 year old person G-d cries for them both. That is what I was taught in the Jewish religion. May little Lieby be held in the palm of G-d's hand. Also, when a person is murdered he is buried in the same clothes that he was murdered in so G-d will take revenge of his death. I was raised an Orthodox Jew and that is what I was taught.

I was told when my son died...(suddenly) at 17 years of age...things happen for a reason...we don't understand.. Maybe because what G-d sent us down here on earth has been accomplished and he is calling us home... or, Perhaps it is to make us more aware of the need to be kind to one another..to extend our hands in friendship and compassion.. I don't really believe in the devil but, the devil that lives in all of us that can emerge if we don't follow G-d's path. May G-d console the Kletzky family...and heal their broken hearts...and the community as well.

Amen

Comment Guidelines

The Jewish Week feels comments create a valuable conversation and wants to feature your thoughts on our website. To make everyone feel welcome, we won't publish comments that are profane, irrelevant, promotional or make personal attacks.

Add comment

The content of this field is kept private and will not be shown publicly.
By submitting this form, you accept the Mollom privacy policy.